“The one”. No, we’re not discussing Keanu Reeves blockbuster role as ‘Neo’. We are talking about that one moment when the stars align and angels descend to let you know you have found the perfect person for you to ride off into the sunset with. A little dramatic don’t you think? The amount of pressure people put on themselves to find the perfect person is astounding. How can anyone live up to the man or woman you have created in your head?
There once was a time when a man would court a woman and she would have her pick of eligible suitors. Fast forward a few hundred years and we now have things like Match.com and Facebook. Things have changed! Getting to know someone has become impersonal and you even have people who are in a “relationship” with someone they’ve never even seen face to face. ‘Catfish’ anyone? Finding that person who is just right for you takes some time and effort but it’s not completely out of the realm of possibility.
There is someone for everyone. No matter what you like, or what you’re in to. They key to finding the right person is to keep your mind open. If you have a set in stone list of things you are waiting for, you may find yourself waiting for a very long time. You might try getting out of your comfort zone. Try speed dating, or joining a meet up where you know there will be other singles. You never know who you’ll meet.
The thing is, at some point, just about everyone finds the “one”. How long it lasts is another issue entirely. Some people are fortunate enough to find the one several times over, and most people will tell you that when they found that special someone, they weren’t even looking; it happened to be some chance meeting; some might even call it fate. The best approach is probably to relax a little. Take some of the pressure off of yourself and let things happen naturally.
The pressure people feel from “concerned” family and friends can be immense. Most people’s concern comes from a good place. They aren’t trying to make you feel bad for not having found that special someone, or trying to be in your business. They want to see you happy, and they associate being happy with being in a relationship. On the other hand, there will be those people who are knee deep in your personal life and are genuinely trying to force you into some kind of relationship with some weirdo they think is “perfect” for you. The best approach to these kinds of meddlesome people is either to ignore them, or be blunt. Tell them to mind their own business! If you are a responsible adult and are okay with not being in a majority seriousness relationship right now, kudos to you. You don’t have to explain yourself.
The idea that, out there somewhere in the wide world, a perfect man or women exists who is just waiting for you is a lovely and romantic notion. Finding that person is whole other story. You may have to wade through a sea of frogs before you find your prince.